Xbox vs iTunes: Battle of the Media Download Services

Almost everyone has an iPod now, and as a result, almost everyone uses iTunes for some reason or another. As a music download service, it’s beyond compare. When it comes to music, podcasts, or audiobooks, iTunes is just about always my go-to service (unless the song is over 6 minutes long, and then I’d probably have to buy the whole album in order to get it. I thought iTunes was supposed to rid us of that, huh?!). But with the addition of video capabilities, and more recently a wider selection of feature films, Apple has been branching out far beyond its established “comfort zone.” Have they gone too far?

Well, there are plenty of video download services, and most of them suck. Amazon’s “Unbox” service needed the help of TiVo in order to save it from premature extinction. So, with Apple’s dominance over the MP3 player market, you’d think that the video component would be just as successful, but one new player’s been in the game since last November that just might give Apple a run for their money. And worst of all, it comes from their biggest competitor.

Microsoft may have dropped the ball on Vista (my guess is that Bill Gates is retiring and becoming a philanthropist in order to clear his conscience of Vista) but the Xbox 360 division of the Big M has been going strong. I’ve had an Xbox 360 for almost a year, and I love that sucker. When I heard that Xbox was beginning to offer movies and television shows for download (some of them in High Definition), it was a huge boost in the 360’s credibility for me. I’ve tried both services, and I’ll try to list the pros and cons here.

Pros: iTunes

iTunes’ first big advantage is its cross-platform accessibility. As stated before, the popularity of the iPod is a big stepping-stone for Apple to climb on. The user interface is friendly, but that’s really par for the course. The prices are fair, especially for TV shows. One really sneaky thing that Apple has integrated into iTunes is the ability to just set up a credit card for Apple to suckle off of every time you buy something, so it seems like you’re getting the movie/TV show/song for free. And, Apple has finally gotten past the limited appeal of the Disney catalogue (with the exception of Cars. My dad loves that movie.) and gotten more mature content. Even though I have way too many copies of Reservoir Dogs, I’m still attracted to the notion of having a portable one!

Pros: Xbox 360

Xbox’s prime advantage comes in two letters: HD. The 360 has the built-in capability to handle high definition content, so they offer high definition content, which makes the techno-nerd in me very happy. Also, since the Xbox is catering to the people who have big-screen HDTVs, the content matches that resolution, for the most part. But the biggest feather in Microsoft’s cap that I can think of is something that can’t be measured in numbers: it’s a lot of fun to use the Xbox Live Marketplace. Maybe it’s the bright colors, but the interface is really enjoyable. While shopping on the iTunes store is more formal, like shopping at Sears or Amazon.com, going through the Xbox Live Marketplace is like going to a Chuck E. Cheese, but without all the kids.

Cons: iTunes

iTunes’ biggest flaw comes from its biggest advantage. The portability of the iPod, while fantastic for music, means that watching video on it is similar to trying to watch a neighbor’s TV through a set of binoculars (not that I’ve tried). And the resolution leaves a bit to be desired. The official description from Apple is “near-DVD quality”. I think that a more appropriate description is “slightly better than Laserdisc.” A lot of the cool shows and movies (24, Law & Order, Pirates of the Caribbean) have deep saturated blacks in them, and “black” is not the friend of the iPod. Sometimes it gets so pixilated, it’s embarrassing.

Cons: Xbox

The 360 has a lot of flaws inherent in its design. The first one is in regard to movies. If you have a 360, and have downloaded movies, you know that the download is a “rental”. After 14 days, or 24 hours after you press Play, the license on the movie expires, and if you want to watch it again, you’ll have to download it again. And, while Xbox is working on getting more high definition content available to its subscribers, the majority of the movies and TV shows are full-frame Standard Definition. The sad fact is that, when you’ve got a widescreen TV, you want to watch things in widescreen.

This can be somewhat forgivable, since it isn’t really the standard yet, and in Microsoft’s mind, the filtering of HDTVs down to the base consumer might not be large enough to warrant this. That’s all understandable, but the current incarnation of the 360 has something that can’t be forgiven: the hard drive is only 20 GB large. With all of the content that can be used on the 360 (game demos, music, saved game data, and now video content) that 20 GB can fill up fast. And another hard drive costs 100 dollars! Microsoft is promising a larger hard drive by the end of the year, but if a 20 GB hard drive costs a seanote, then what would an 80 GB hard drive cost?! You could buy another 360 with that cash!

Finally, in contrast to Apple’s “invisible credit”, where you’re being billed, but you don’t feel like it, Microsoft reminds you how much dough you’ve got to spend. The Xbox Live Marketplace utilizes something called “Microsoft Points”, a debit system of points that act like cash in this virtual store. Every time you buy something, the points get deducted, and you’re reminded of how many points you have left. So, if you buy 1000 points, you can slowly watch those 1000 points go down the tube. While it may be realistic, it’s obviously not good business to remind the customer that they’re spending money. And once those points do run out, you buy another block of points. If I were Microsoft, I’d go the route of iTunes and internet porn providers, where they just invisibly and automatically take your money. As a consumer, I appreciate that.

Final Verdict: Draw

I know, it’s kind of the pussy way out, but it’s too close to call. The barometer is that if there’s a video (like South Park) which is available on both services, I’d be probably more likely to purchase it from iTunes, for the express reasons because my Xbox hard drive is almost full, and the episodes usually aren’t in widescreen to begin with on the Xbox. But new technology should be closing the already small gap between the two. As mentioned earlier, Microsoft is planning a larger hard drive for the 360 (hopefully the price is fair), but Apple is also going to be rolling out their $300 AppleTV sometime this month, which caters to HDTVs. I hope that the release of AppleTV is a sign that Apple is embracing high definition content. If they are, then Microsoft’s advantage is severely injured. But, as I close this already long-winded review, I will say that shopping on the Xbox Live Marketplace is a lot of fun, and one of the best features of the Xbox 360 and Xbox Live service. That’s something that Apple can’t take away, yet.

REVIEW: The Number 23

The Number 23 attempts to be a look into paranoia, obsession, and the the inability of a man to live down his wrongdoings. Sadly, this Joel Schumacher-helmed thriller fails on almost all counts.

The film follows Walter Sparrow, a dog-catcher who leads a seemingly normal life, who comes into possession of a beaten up manuscript of a novel called The Number 23. As he reads it, he finds interesting parallels with his own life, and starts to see the number 23 in every facet of his own life. Instead of seeking professional help, he gives it the old college try, and becomes entangled in a web of murder and paranoia in the process.

Like most movies, I feel that the problems are mostly contained at the script level. This is a very complicated story that takes more twists and turns than a highway in Switzerland. And, like most movies that attempt this sort of story, by the time you get to the ending, the beginning doesn’t make sense. And I felt that the script was trying to talk about way too many things at once. Great films, like The Matrix or Star Wars have many different layers of thematic material that the audience can peel back and expose for themselves, but those levels are mostly subconscious and aren’t driving the plot unless the audience is consciously searching for them. When watching The Number 23, I saw it starting out as a story of a growing, unhealthy obsession that then morphed into a story about supernatural forces, (as they state in the film, 2 divided by 3 is 1.666) and finally, the story did another chameleon-like transformation into a whodunit murder and a tale of ruin and redemption. You just get the sense that the scriptwriter was grasping for straws and throwing anything in that seemed to fit. The title sequence is a great metaphor for this, as it points out all the seemingly coincidental occurrences of 23 in our history. Anything that fit the base requirements went in, regardless of whether or not it helped the story.

Another death-toll on this film’s conscience is its believability. I know… the movie is about a vast numerical conspiracy that drives people loony, but you’ve got to ground it in some sort of reality. The teenage kid in the film (his name escapes me at the moment) is a pretty good example of this. He starts out as a sort of apathetic teenager who just wants to make out with his girlfriend, but is thoughtful enough to get his dad a birthday present. Later, he becomes his father’s cheerleader, buying every part of his crazy story, contributing to the discussion and even throwing out ideas. I can’t help but think that at some point, the screenwriter thought he needed someone to kick the plot in the ass, and this kid was the best candidate. And also, I don’t want to give away anything, but when one character has another character hold a knife to his or her throat and scream “Kill Me!” in order to prove a point, aren’t they really just asking for it?

Like most “legitimate” reviewers, I feel that Jim Carrey was mis-cast in this role. Not because I only want to see him in movies where he talks with his butt, but because he isn’t the right kind of crazy. He’s “cartoon-crazy” or “eccentric”. His craziness is just weird, not dangerous or terrifying. I think this role would’ve been much better filled by Nick Stahl, someone with an innocent face and can gain your sympathy, but can also be totally bat-shit crazy if he wants to be. Not to say that Carrey does a horrible job; it’s quite interesting to watch him try and do these things that the script requires him to. His Walter Sparrow may not be entirely realistic, but he’s real enough to keep you watching. Virginia Madsen, on the other hand, was very well cast. She was relatively believable, although I thought that, like most characters surrounding Walter, they all went along with this idea a little too easily, she maintained a level of skepticism that helped keep me in the story a little. Again, not enough to keep me from noticing a bunch of plot holes along the way, but enough to keep me from walking out.

I will say that the film has its moments. I thought that the cinematography was beautifully done, especially the fantasy sequences, which reminded me so much of Sin City. And I’d say that the best thing that the movie does is create the mysticism surrounding the number 23. I love a story with a good tone or backdrop, and this one does a pretty good job. You know certain things are going to happen, but at least there is some mystery as to how that’s all going to pan out.

This At-Bat (get it? “Bat”?), Joel Schumacher manages a single, but gets tagged trying to steal second. The Number 23 is the sort of film you may want to wait for DVD to check out, as I don’t think it merits 7-10 dollars per person to go see in the theaters. If you’d like a story about paranoia that is a bit better done than this one, and already out on DVD, I’d take a look at Secret Window. While I love Jim Carrey’s work, Johnny Depp’s performance in that movie can run circles around his. Maybe I’m prejudiced because I’m a Stephen King fan; who knows?

I’m going to end this one with a bit of biting sarcasm, directed at Mr. Schumacher himself. Joel, if this movie really is about the ability of our past sins to come back to haunt us, I’ve got 3 words for you. Actually, it’s 2 words and an ampersand: Batman & Robin.

Final Judgement: 2.3 “23”s out of 5

P.S. By the way, if you look carefully, every 23rd word of this review forms this sentence: “His a reads own paranoia complicated by about the is obsession 6 just a the its some this. To discussion the another just to or someone say to was idea to say much 3 are get you see on circles of back and.” Wow. I suck at this hidden message shit.

P.P.S. Although… if you count the numbers in that sentence, there are 43 of them. Obviously, I didn’t hit the end of the review evenly; I had about 20 words left over. Now, if you subtract those 20 spare words from the 43 of the sentence itself, you get…

Holy shit… I’m a fuckin’ genius.

Fuck the Buzz

It’s Oscar time again, and you know what that means…

You can infer a lot about the Oscars, regardless of what films are up, what the “buzz” is, or who the host is. First of all, on Sunday, E!’s programming will cease to exist, instead they’ll cover the Oscars from 12 Noon to 12 Midnight. They haven’t gone so far as to pull pages out of CBS’ or Fox’s playbook when they host the Super Bowl, but I think they’re pretty damn close. Next year, I expect to see John Madden in the broadcast booth sitting next to Ryan Seacrest, drawing circles on Matt Damon’s head (and maybe Angelina Jolie’s breasts, too). It may not go that far, but I’m almost positive that at the end of the show, when the director and producer go up to accept the Oscar for Best Picture, somebody will dump Gatorade on them.

But here’s the big question I ask myself every year, and maybe we should all ask ourselves this: “Do I really care?”

I love the movies, and I’m not against the notion of the Oscars, but every year I find myself caring less and less. This is probably just me, and I’m a little embarrassed to call myself a film buff in spite of this, but I haven’t seen any of the films nominated for best picture, or any of the films nominated period! (No wait. That’s not true. I saw Apocolypto, but come on! Can that really win anything?!) So I really have no dog in this fight whatsoever.

And the Oscars are becoming more predictable than ever. Remember last year? Anyone nominated of Best Actor who wasn’t Philip Seymour Hoffman wouldn’t even bet you one dollar that they’d win anything. After he won three major awards in a row, it was a no-brainer. I’m sure he even cleared off a spot on his mantle for the statue days before the Oscar ceremony. And, as much as I loved The Lord of the Rings, Return of the King should NOT have won 7 Oscars. No movie is that universally good. I was proud that Peter Jackson won Best Director, because he deserved it. Some of the technical people deserved props as well, but seven separate statues?! Also, my roommate last year succeeded in predicting just about all of the winners for last year’s show. Yet, when we played poker, he was always the first one to bust out.

Thankfully, this year isn’t as predictable. I’m glad that the Academy chose to exclude Dreamgirls from the Best Picture race, because it obviously had “Oscar” written all over it. But that’s not to say I’m not interested in the outcome. I’d like to see Little Miss Sunshine win something major, because having a dark comedy like that being considered for something like the Oscars is a nice sign that the awards aren’t being so pompous and erudite this year. I’d also like to see Martin Scorsese win something for The Departed, but mostly because he’s an NYU alumni. If he won, the school would shut down. I mean, the entire NYU community collectively wet their pants last year when John Canemaker’s The Moon and the Son won an animation award. If Scorsese won, it’d be near anarchy. Think of Los Angeles during the Rodney King riots…

And finally, the issue of who’s hosting always bugs me. Past years have seen Billy Crystal, Whoopi Goldberg (no Robin Williams yet, which is a problem I hope gets corrected soon), Steve Martin, Chris Rock, and Jon Stewart. This year, it’s Ellen DeGeneres, probably the most non-threatening lesbian comic out there, which I say as a term of endearment. I think that’s a good choice, because she’s a nice fit for the Oscars. Her act is more about being wacky than being socially relevant, observant, or mean. Other comics (Chris Rock definitely) rely on being aggressive to be funny, and that can’t happen at the Oscars. They could even hire Lewis Black as the host, and find a way to take the claws out of him. Everybody says the host for the Oscars sucks every  year, but I blame the gig more than the comic. Think about it, you’re playing to a group of Hollywood heavyweights, most of them uptight at being made fun of in such a public atmosphere, and almost everyone in the room just wants the ceremony to move faster so they can find out if they won and then move on to the important part: the after-party. In that aspect, they’re like parents at their kid’s school concert.

So, Mr. Little Gold Statue, you won’t be monopolizing my Sunday this year. I don’t know what I’ll do with myself, now, but I sure won’t be wasting my time watching a near pointless parade of celebrities, numbing my brain to the point of total cerebral failure. I’ll be doing something with my time, damnit!

…Family Guy’s on Sundays, right?

Bad Dog

This one’s a little late, so forgive me…

I read on the news a few days ago that Duane Chapman, better known to people as “Dog the Bounty Hunter” has lost his legal battle with the Mexican government, and will soon be extradited to Mexico to face charges for… get this.. bounty hunting.

Apparently, this whole hubbub started when Chapman and crew went down to Mexico (“The Other North American Land-Mass”) and apprehended Andrew Luster, the heir to Max Factor cosmetics, who fled the US for Mexico while he was on trial for poisoning and rape. The issue here is that bounty hunting is illegal in Mexico. So, when Chapman & Co. refused to turn him back in to the Mexican authorities, they were declared fugitives themselves. They were arrested in Honolulu in 2006 and have been fighting extradition ever since.

Well, the Dog lost this fight, and he’s headed back to Mexico to face charges and, if convicted, he faces up to 4 years in prison. Luster, on the other hand, is now in jail and serving multiple life sentences.

The first thing that comes to mind when I think about this case is, “Why did it take the Mexican government so long to find this guy?” I mean, he has a freakin’ TV show, for Christ’s sake! I guess they don’t get cable in Mexico…

But on a serious note, these are the sort of cases that test your resolve. First of all, you’ve got to admire Chapman’s determination and resolve. As far as I can see, this wasn’t personal; it was about justice, and bringing someone who tried to use a loophole in the system to win his freedom back down to earth. But, on the other hand, the law is there to make us act better than our instincts push us to. Even though this guy was probably laughing at us from across the border, you can’t just reach across the line and pull the guy back. Sadly, this case is pretty open and shut, unless their lawyer can either push the definition of “bounty hunting”, or confuse them with bad spanish grammar.

Mr. Chapman knows what it’s like to be in prison. He spent many years locked up for 2nd Degree Murder before becoming a bounty hunter. If there is “justice” in the truest sense of the word, then I’d hope that he can avoid going to jail again.

But, if he does go to prison, and they allow the A&E cameras in there, I’m sooooo watching that.